In video games and our own life there have been some great Presidential figures (as well as some awful ones). With President’s Day behind us, I figured that this would be a good time to take a look back at some of the great (and awful) Presidents in video game history. So kick back and enjoy some virtual Presidential representation found in video game history.
First appeared in: Bad Dudes vs. Dragon Ninjas (Arcade)
Ronnie is the President of the United States and was initially based on Ronald Reagan (in the arcade edition). The home release for the NES updated Ronnie and replaced him with a version of George Bush Sr. Since Bush Sr. was serving in The Oval Office at the time of the home version’s release. The President in this arcade classic is quite possibly the greatest version of a President to appear in any video game for several reasons. The greatest reason is spelled out in the opening titles of the game, “The President has been kidnapped by ninjas. Are you a bad enough dude to rescue the President?”
That iconic quote spells it out for you; this President is a badass. Of all the enemies that could threaten national security, terrorists, spies, communists; it is fricken’ Ninjas that have to be called in to capture this President. Only Ninjas could kidnap this man, no one else could get the job done. To even further solidify President Ronnie as a “BAMF”, it is not just one Ninja that captures the President. No, it is a whole army of Ninjas that are needed to succeed in this Presidential kidnapping!
So as we all know President Ronnie calls in the Bad Dudes to come to his aid. They successfully complete their mission after punching, kicking and screaming “I’m bad!” through several levels. In order to reward the dudes for their heroic efforts, the President invites them to stay at The White House for a round of burgers. Nothing says a job well done like a couple of burgers; and burgers at The White House of all places! If I were to make a list of places I wanted to eat a burger, The White House would definitely be in my top five. So whether it is President Ronnie or an un-named President Bush, I salute thee and your efforts to spread burger awareness to the world!
President George Sears
First appeared in: Metal Gear Solid 2 Sons of Liberty (PS2)
WTF IS THIS?! ROBOT TENTACLES AND SWORDS?!
President George Sears, better known by Solidus Snake could have been one of the greatest video game Presidents of all time. While his first actual appearance was in Metal Gear Solid 2, he appears off screen in a phone conversation in the original Metal Gear Solid on the PSX. Listening to a report from Revolver Ocelot. Now granted, shady underground dealings do not make a good President, but President Sears was damn good at keeping secrets! He was the third clone of Big Boss; Solidus Snake: supposedly the perfect clone of the original. The fact that no one knew not only that he was the third clone, but also that a third clone even existed shows how adept he was at keeping his dealings away from the general public. To an extent his motto could be, “what the people do not know will not hurt them”. But then old Georgie goes and throws it all away.
President Sears decided after his term was over that it is time for him to reveal his secret identity to the world! Does he do it by releasing his memoirs? Does he write “a tell all” book? Does he go on a talk show circuit tour? Not even close! He dons an “exo-suit” with tentacles, equips himself with Katana in order to hijack an oil rig and steal the latest Metal Gear. Why does he do this? Well it is so rational. You see, he did this to get a list of names of people who may or may not exist. Who were pulling the strings behind the scenes of The White House; trying to censor the internet or something. Now to be fair, it has been quite a few years since I played this game so memory is fuzzy on the specifics. Also, this plot has been made fun of enough over the years so I will leave it here. Long story short, President Sears was not that memorable of a president as his post-Presidential plans made no sense.
First Appeared in: Sonic Adventure 2 (Dreamcast)
I am just going to come out now and say it. Mr. President from Sonic Adventure 2 was the worst video game President of all time. First off, the man does not even have a name. Everyone and I mean EVERYONE just calls him Mr. President. What the hell did people call him before he was President? I can imagine his wedding: “…and do you take MR. PRESIDENT to be your lawfully wedded husband?” Moving away from his lack of a given name, this man is the picture perfect example of incompetence.
All he is seen doing in game is sitting in his limo listening to his secretary with an annoying as ass voice. He also has the worst secret service agents ever. No agents accompany him in his limo and no agents follow him in other vehicles. An anthropomorphic blue hedgehog and his annoying pal that you might be familiar with locate his limo and barge their way in. Never having met Sonic and Co. Mr. President simply lets them do what they want then lets them leave. Clearly the logical, and most Presidential thing to do. You know, aside taking them into custody and interrogating them to find out what the hell is going on. Or having scientists inspect the creatures to find out how a talking blue hedgehog and two-tailed fox can exist.
Would you like some further evidence as to how he is the worst video game President ever? To deal with the terrorist threats of Dr. Robotnik (I refuse to call him Eggman) he sends in Rouge the Bat as a Spy. That is right, rather than using the vast amount of resources he has available to him, in the form of the FBI or the Army. He hires a freelance furry, who cares more about jewels than homeland security. !$@$& you Mr. President. Get a name!
WORST PRESIDENT EVER
First Appeared in: Resident Evil 4 (Well, he did not but his daughter did) (Gamecube)
The kidnapping of President Graham’s daughter formed the plot of Resident Evil 4. While President Graham never appears in the game in person or in voice, I included him in this article since unlike another President, he knows how to pick the right agent for the job. Leon S. Kennedy is a one man army that not only rescues the President’s daughter, Ashley. But also successfully gets a parasite removed from her body and refuses her sexual advances at the end of the mission. Leon had an instant sex ticket starring him in the face and he turned it down. Now that is a man you can trust. If someone refuses sex with your willing daughter, that makes them the most trustworthy person ever. Wait that came out sounding a bit wrong. Still though, you cannot deny that President Graham knows how to pick the most effective method. He could have sent a team to rescue his daughter or call in the whole army, but instead he decides to send one trustworthy man instead to finish the job. Also, sending in only one person is extremely cost effective and saves the country money.
He sure can Pick 'em
Bill F’n Clinton
First Appeared in: NBA Jam T.E. (SNES/Genesis)
Bill Clinton. Love him or hate him, he did some good thing during his eight years in The White House despite his sexual promiscuity with some interns. One of those good things he did was play a damn good game of basketball as a hidden character in a popular NBA title. It is Bill fricken Clinton playing basketball! Let that sink in for a few minutes. The leader of the free world kicking ass on the old B-ball court, teaming up with the likes of such greats of the time like Karl Malone and Scotty Pippen. Bill Clinton sinking 3-pointers, shooting from downtown, and figuratively and literally setting the court on fire is a thing of beauty. Can any of Canada’s leaders say they were in a home port of a popular arcade title? How about North Korea or India? No way! God bless America and thanks for reading.
GO BILL GO!